He says that the profiles are old and he just hasn't had time to change them...but he made those profiles AFTER we already met. He says that he loves me, so why is he putting such things in his AOL profile, as well as his Myspace account?
We have been together for 3.5 years, and he has NEVER given me any reason to distrust him. I don't mean to sound like I don't trust him, but it makes me wonder...
My boyfriend's online profile says he is looking for his true love...how should I respond to this?
If he lied to you about the online profiles, there's no telling what else he may have lied about. And if he doesn't consider you to be his true love after 3 and a half years, that to me seems like a clear warning sign. If you believe that the online profile thing is the only fluke in the relationship, you may want to work on the relationship with him a bit more. But if you can't get past the online profile incident, it may be time to cut him loose. It's entirely up to you, but make sure you weigh the options carefully.
Reply:Grab his face, and slap the sh@t out of him and tell him, His true love has just left the bldg......
Reply:Well I would be a little upset to. I would just in a nice way ask him if he would mind changing it. That way he knows it bothers you but you are not nagging and gripping at him to change it. Then see how he responds. If it is still up there tell him, well I hope you find your true love one day to. That will get the message across.
Reply:The fact that you are asking this question is because you are not so trusting of him. As a guy, i think is not being honest with you. If the profiles bother you he should remove them and not make excuses. If the remain then I'm sorry but he might not be totally honest with you.
Reply:Uhhh....don't trust him. Infact, he HAS given you a reason to not trust him.
Girlfriend, if you aint his true love, then move on. Don't waste your time, don't waste your life. Good luck!
Reply:Well the fact that he made them after you guys met is a big sign! You need to calmly tell him that you want him to erase those profiles, because really if you guys have been together for almost 4 years, that is totally inappropriate (in my opinion at least).
Trust me when I say this, that I've been through this, and you have already taken his word for it the first time, giving him the benefit of the doubt. But now it is time to be serious about this, because there is nothing worth being with someone who is untrustworthy.
Ask him to please remove it, and tell him if he does not, that you are going to assume that he is looking for someone else. If that becomes the case, get rid of him, he's not worth it. I know it will be hard, but you will find someone else. You sound like a trusting and loving person who deserves someone equally so. If he does erase it, you will know that he respects your feelings, and you can learn and move on from this together.
Good luck and best to you!
Reply:I would definitely have a problem if I was u. Be very cautious, this is a major warning flag, and a big no-no. Wouldn't u want a man that would take the TIME to ease u'r mind. I wish he would recreate new profiles of u both as a couple. He is no longer single, but he is still looking. More than one profile means this was no accident.
Reply:yea I do understand where you are coming from.But really out of my experience.all that on-line stuff.such as myspace.it hard to trust them on-line.my hubby and I both deleted our accounts.because we noticed that just brought us problems and more arguing.cause stuff as what you are saying.just suggest to him that maybe he should just deleted his account.and if he say oh well that is how i talk to my friends.Be like well your real friend should be able to call you.you don't have to talk to them on-line.and be like i think that would be best for our relationship.
Reply:lol, no idea, sorry, if u confront him he will just get mad at u for snooping in his privacy, so i dunno. good luck though
Reply:try asking him if he really thinks that you're his true love, and if he says yes, then ask him to remove those things from his profile, if he does, then trust him and take his word that those are old, he obviously cares that you care if he takes those out.
Reply:Sorry to say this, but he HAS just given you a reason to distrust him. Either he is still looking, or he is a liar.
Reply:It seems like though he may love you he is keeping his options open just in case something better comes along.
Reply:hmm... sounds a little weird to me. i would tell him that i thought it was disrespectful to me and it hurts my feelings....
Reply:Get smart. He's looking. Deep down you don't really trust him....or you wouldn't be asking.
Reply:Give him an ultimatum - either fix it within 3 days or go find his true love and you will go find yours! Don't waste any more than your 3.5 years on this shi* a*s. How dare he! I would be absolutely furious! Have more self worth than putting up with his nonsense, please. Why do you want to stay with a liar?
Reply:Yeah, I can relate to that very well....
3.5 years is along time, but are you his one true love? Sometimes people mistake time as a definite answer to a lifelong companion. I think he might mean it in a spiritual way, more than just not claiming you. Besides, when you two first met, how was he suppose to know if you two were going to be together for a long time? That was probally his aspiration when he met you.
Relationships and online profiles always cause drama..I KNOW!!....I suggest you talk to him and ask him to update his profile out of respect for you, and you should do the same.
Reply:Well maybe there is something going on and he is missing something from your relationship. But he doesn't know how to tell you. Maybe you need to write down like 5 questions and say they came from a article you read in a magazine about making sure the bond is strong in your relationship. Think hard on the five questions too. Because if they are the right ones they can hit on something he doesn't want to bring up. You should both write answers to the questions and then switch them and when you see his answers don't be mad but be really honest and ask him why he feels a certain way. And vice versus. Such questions can be, is our love as strong as when we first started dating? How much has our love grown in the last few years? Are there any ways to improve our relationship? If so what ways are they? Stuff like that, til you can get him talking about what is really going on. He probably is feeling a bit bored. And since guys don't like feeling like the bad guy, they always try to find another prospective mates instead of trying to work things out in the current relationship. But I think the questions will help if he is open to answering them honestly. Good Luck.
Reply:It might mean he is not happy with the relationship he is in at the moment but he might be using you until he finds another girl.
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